Suing Seto Kaiba
by Dragons Chaotica
Summary: Sequel to "Death Trap" Kaiba gets angry and the whole gang gets over their aversion to lawyers.


Me: Hey y'all! Sorry about the horrendous gap in updates, I'm constantly ill and in college, but a while ago I wrote a story called 'Death Trap' this is the sequel, which I have promised to write for "Undead Assassin"

So..

**To: Undead Assassin**

**From: Dragons Chaotica**

I own nothing

* * *

The air was still, it seemed heavy; it reeked of dust, and the jolly fat man behind the big desk? He was NOT Santa.

The man's name was (The Honorable) Judge Matthews, and this may have been the absolute strangest case he had ever had the misfortune to preside over. The accusations were large, usually somewhere around Involuntary Attempted Manslaughter, and Aiding and Abetting Child Abusers, with a few counts of Reckless Endangerment tossed in for giggles.

As far as (The Honorable) Judge Matthews knew, a lawsuit hadn't originally been what was planned. In fact he was pretty sure everybody involved hated lawyers. However (allegedly) one Seto Kaiba, had decided to call one Jaden Yuki, a multitude of horrible names under, odd….circumstances. All involved claimed to have had their souls stolen and (allegedly) placed in an unknown area called 'The Shadow Realm', there were some big names in this case, real big names, Yugi Mouto, Chazz Princeton, Aster Phoenix, Zane Trusedale, Mai Valentine…It was going to be a circus. Back to the story, apparently once Mr. Jaden Yuki had arrived with Mr. Yugi Mouto, Mr. Seto Kaiba had (allegedly) begun wailing about what a failure the boy was, the resulting argument compromising Mr. Zane Trusedales heart (It was better now), slandering Mr. Aster Phoenix (Somehow he was to blame for some parts of this, according to Mr. Kaiba), and causing Mr. Chazz Princeton to be sent back to anger management after his subsequent meltdown. Mr. Kaiba was, of course, counter-suing.

See, when he (allegedly) flipped out, he was struck by Ms. Mai Valentine, and Ms. Alexis Rhodes (Two counts of assault), Mr's. Phoenix, Ishtar, Trusedale, and Princeton had attempted to quell the fighting, resulting in mental and physical, in one case, damage upon the four, but during this (allegedly) Mr. Kaiba had been slandered. Mr. Mouto was primarily a witness, though Mr. Kaiba was suing him for Aiding and Abetting his slander and assault, by doing nothing, as well as insulting him while he was struck. (The Honorable) Judge Matthews buried his head in his hands, this was going to be a very long day.

* * *

"All rise." Announced the bailiff, predictably, all rose. "Be seated." All were seated.

"Any particular reason you're standing Phoenix?" Seto grumbled moodily to Aster, who had remained standing.

Aster raised one perfectly arched silver brow, and responded with the air of someone speaking to a person suffering retardation "I have a law degree." He'd even gestured to himself.

"Enough, you two!" (The Honorable) Judge Matthews called from the stands "Opening statements from the defense?"

Mr. Howard X Miller rose and began speaking with his warbling nasal southern-ish accent "Ladies and Gentleman of the jury, my client is not guilty of any wrongdoing! These children merely want the money this lawsuit could produce. Mr. Kaiba has an exemplary record with the county and is very concerned for every one of his students much like he would be for his own younger brother. Please, let's just get this done with quickly."

The jury nodded

(The Honorable) Judge Matthews, look to Aster next "Opening statement from the prosecution?"

Aster rose, and faced the jury, putting on a winning smile he began "Ladies and gentleman of the jury, this court case is more for the Duel Academy than myself and my clients, we all love the school, and feel that this is the only way to get the point across that Mr. Kaiba should be more careful with his programs, as well as the fact that Mr. Kaiba's record is not at all clean, and perhaps a new head of Duel academy should be reinstated. He has been negligent at every turn, and has even aided in at least one case of child psychological abuse, he has built a school for minors upon an island with an active volcano, hours away from land, or help, please listen to the evidence and do what we all know is right."

"First witness?"

Aster smirked evilly, "The prosecution calls Mokuba Kaiba to the stand."

Mokuba approached the stand, and was sworn in quickly.

"Mr., Kaiba" Aster began "How old are you?"

"OBJECTION!"

"Simple establishment, Your Honor."

(The Honorable) Judge Matthews nodded "I'll allow it. Answer the question Mr. Kaiba."

"I am sixteen."

"Okay, then. And Mr. Kaiba, since you entered your brothers care, exactly how many times have you been kidnapped?"

"OBJECTION!"

"Mr. Phoenix?"

"Establishing pattern of negligence Your Honor."

"I'll allow it."

Mokuba sighed "615"

Aster chocked softly and touched his throat, before clearing it "You have been kidnapped 615 times?"

"Yeah.."

Aster cast a wordless glance at the jury "And how many times did your brother come to save you? And this is also establishing pattern of negligence, I'm sincerely hoping at this point that Mr. Seto Kaiba will surprise me."

"Only the important ones." Mokuba sighed

Aster winced and looked accusingly at Seto, who shrank back into his seat "I wasn't aware that there were unimportant kidnappings."

"Well, okay, the serious ones only."

"So now there are non-serious kidnappings? I believe my pattern has been established." He looked to Mr. X Miller "The prosecution rests. Your witness."

* * *

"…And so after screaming at me for about four minutes my chest started to hurt and I realized I was going into cardiac arrest."

Aster nodded "And what did Mr. Kaiba do once you fell to the floor?"

"Objection! How do you know what he did next?"

Seto Kaiba dismissed his lawer.

"He told me that I should breathe or my lungs would obviously hurt."

Kaiba groaned

"The prosecution rests, your witness." Zane has been the last of them, Aster himself did not testify.

"I'm good." Kaiba said waving his hand idly "As a matter of fact, I would like to request a short recess."

"Are you in agreement Mr. Phoenix?" (The Honorable) Judge Matthews asked.

"I am."

"Very well."

* * *

"I will write everybody a personal apology letter and grant you all five mill to drop the charges and let me keep my school."

"You will file charges against Slade and Jagger Princeton, get better emergency response teams and fire Crowler as well."

"Deal, anything else?"

"Kaiba Mansion. And we let you keep Mokuba."

Seto sighed "Fine."

* * *

Chazz fiddled with a French fry at a nearby diner "So was this settled out of court, or…?"

Alexis took a sip of her shake "You know, I have no idea! Aster?"

"I have a law degree and a genius I.Q and I'm not sure what to call it."

"Blatant surrender?" Seto hissed, biting his burger viciously.

Zane smiled evilly "Just desserts?" he chuckled sneaking a French fry from Chazz, who didn't seem to notice.

Mai laughed and snapped up another of Chazz's fries "They got you Kaiba!"

"That makes thirty-five, you all owe me a small fry."

Kaiba looked incredulously at the youngest Princeton "I think I like you."

Atticus stood looking weary "Look, let's just go home, and forget this ever happened, Seto, you can stay with us until you get back on your feet m'kay?"

Seto wisely held his tongue.

* * *

Yes, I'm sorry, but my fever makes me confuzzled, sorry if this makes no sense.


End file.
